So, these ideals of "thanks giving" actually hit home with me pretty well, even if the history (& occasional images) behind the whole holiday is/are distasteful and disturbing. Appreciating what you have - I can't help wondering if that's because I have less or more than others. Maybe because I've been on both sides of things. I'd say financially I'm way up, globally speaking. I feel more than a bit family poor, and that's regardless of whether I'd try to be around them or not: here drowning in bittersweet melancholy and romanticized hope, there abused and angry. It would be really nice to break into clean, clear reality, like the cool wind hitting my face as the sun warms my body on a great day. I wish I always had the happiness I feel rushing through my heart when I'm out on my bike on a day like that.
Anyway, today as a treat to myself I didn't sleep in too late, made myself a yummy, healthy breakfast, listened to two of my newest, favorite albums, watched a silly, sexy, romantic movie, and, when I realized "I'm so jaded!" said it, laughed at it, said it louder, laughed again and kind of danced like the lovely silly goof I know I can be when I've got me all alone. I was just about to go out for a bike ride, but when I finally went out to bring in the last of the plants, realized it has become incredibly cold outside. Well, maybe I'll bundle up and go for a while anyway. I'm pretty much just talking to myself at this point.
The point in sitting down to write today was to remember that I made the best I could of what might otherwise have been a pretty crappy day, and I feel pretty happy about things overall, so - yeah - shut up and smile. :)
